Category: Humor in daily life

“Stop worrying,” she tells me.

“Take a half a xanax,” she tells me.

“This is no big deal,” she tells me, as our patio furniture gets flung around and our roof is hammered with tree branches.

The next thing I hear is a loud snap and crack.

I then decided that a WHOLE xanax would be best and lil Gracie and I headed for bed.

Life with the princess continues to be fun.

Hope all of you are well.

I’ll catch ya next time, “looking at life from my shoes.”

My friend died yesterday. 

Three months ago when she called me to tell me that she had stage 4 cancer, she let me know that her biggest regret about this “whole cancer thing” was that she probably wouldn’t have the time to see the results of the presidential elections.

She was right. 

She didn’t.

What she DID have the time for, though, was to make sure that her many friends were all made abundantly aware of her love and appreciation for her time with us and that each of us were a joy and gift to her and sent us blessings via emails that her daughter graciously sent on.

And in this solitary gesture of love and kindness, what she did was to give us a gift; one last (and in some ways, lasting) gift from a woman who had given so much joy, kindness, laughter and encouragement to so many of us.

I am heart-broken, but so very grateful and honored to have known her and to have called her my good friend. 

The last message to all of us was for us to “be as loving and compassionate as we can, to our self and others” and then she fell asleep!

My dear, sweet Rozie Roo. She was my mentor, my friend and my surrogate big sister. 

And I loved her with my whole heart.

Thank you, dear Rozie, for your gift of joy and kindness; thank you, dear friend, for your unconditional love.

R.I.P. my loving, sweet, funny friend. 

I’ll see ya on the flip side!

For those of you who know the Princess, you know she loves animals – really LOVES animals and anything living. She tried her darndest years ago to resuscitate a caterpillar by flipping over its lifeless body and gently rubbing between its legs to bring it back to life. Her innocent attempt actually succeeded and the little bugger crawled happily away.

I, on the other hand, am very selective with my love and have a slight fear of any animal that shows too much enthusiasm. Jumping dogs. Bucking horses. Running bulls.

And if the truth be told, I’m guilty of stepping on spiders, squishing most insects that I find in my home and am not a fan of bees while I garden.

You get the picture.

This coronavirus pandemic has us (like most of society) stressed to the max. So we’re making a lot of cupcakes, eating bags of popcorn and cookies, and binge watching a lot of Doc Martin, lately. (If the woman calls me “tosser” one more time, I’m gonna toss her and her little animal-loving self out into the cold!)

To offset this binge eating, we’re taking daily walks. For most couples this is a lovely, outdoor experience bordering on spiritual enlightenment. For the Princess and I, there are times it turns into a lovely tug-of-war; with SHE running over to pet and love on one of the neighbor’s dogs, and ME gently reminding her that we have a “six foot rule” to abide by.

So yesterday during our daily outdoor ritual, I saw one of the neighbors give her dog a treat for not running toward us and jumping, and I got an idea.

Today we went for a walk and the Princess smiled at the dog-walking neighbor, said, “Good morning” and kept walking.

Genius here pulled out a Hersey Kiss, gave it to her and said, “Good job!”

Needless to say, I now have a black and blue arm and she has been calling me “tosser” most of the day.

Oh well, a moment of levity in the midst of a pretty scary time in our lives.

Stay healthy and safe, People, and I’ll catch ya the next time, looking at life from my shoes.

Education was important to my mother.

Keeping her children happy was even more important.

So, when her oldest daughter lost her sense of humor and started freaking out about final exams the week before graduation, Momma Benedetti went to her bag of tricks to ease the tension.

She dressed up in my graduation cap and gown and declared she was a “college gad-gee-ate”.

When that didn’t so much as get a smile from me, she tried walking into my bedroom with a rose between her teeth and asked me to tango.

Unfortunately, I was so hung up on doing well on my finals, that neither action made me any less anxious.

Yes, I was her more sensitive child. The one the doctors always referred to as “emotional” and recommended enemas on a regular basis.

You know the kind.

Every family has one.

And lucky me, I was the one.

It wasn’t until the next morning, while I was sitting on the throne, looking down at the painted toenails of our clawfoot bathtub, that I burst out laughing.

Mom had painted all of the nails on the claws with bright red nail polish.

Her oldest daughter needed to laugh, and Mom wasn’t giving up until I did.

She succeeded.

I sat there on the toilet laughing hysterically and shaking my head in awe.

Mom got me on that one.

I was now prepared to kick some serious butt on the last of my final exams and to graduate from community college.

Thanks, Mom.

It’s because of you that I went on and became a “college gad-gee-ate”.

I miss her every day, but it’s memories like these that keep her close to my heart and very much alive.

Love you, Mom.

Love you to the moon and back.

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