Being a tad sleep deprived lately, I decide last night to cuddle up with the Princess thinking, “maybe, a little body warmth and snuglin’ will do the trick!”
I’m not even into the first 5 minutes of REM sleep, when the Princess starts coughing and hacking, jarring my sleepless self out of what I thought was a nice cozy dream.
“Oh swell”, I mumble to her in my state of sleepiness, “you ate something with dairy in it last night, didn’t you, hun?” I ask her with a bit of an attitude.
“Yes,” she groggily answers.
“Remember”, she asks, “We had those milkshakes at McDonald’s?”
“You better sleep in your own bed tonight,” she continues, “You’ve got a bad case of “Jimmy Legs” and you’re keeping me awake.”
I’ve got Jimmy Legs and I’m keeping her awake?
It’s a dam miracle I’m not walking around with permanent body tics, for Chriminy sakes! But what do I know?
“No problem, Hun”, I brusquely mumble back to her, “I’ll just go sleep in the garage next to the cat’s litter box.”
I’m stumbling back to my bedroom and thinking to myself, “For Pete’s sakes, I’ve got a friend who thinks I need to learn how to breathe better, an endocrinologist who suspects I’m bi-polar, a rheumatologist who seriously believes I have some “sleep issues” and a bunch of friends and relatives who have concluded that I’m a ‘tad over–sensitive’ because I cry at the drop of a hat.”
Over-sensitive? Yah think I’m a smidgen over-sensitive, People?
For Chriminy sakes! It’s a miracle there’s not a little white van waiting to whisk me away to some funny farm where I can frolic and play with other sensitive individuals with breathing issues!
I could be wrong, but I think I need a new endocrinologist, a cat that doesn’t whine, a quieter neighborhood and a FULL night’s sleep!
But what the hell do I know?
I’m not breathing too good these days and probably not getting enough oxygen to my brain to think too clearly, as well!
Have a good one, People!
And remember: Be kind to one another. We’re all frolicking on the same funny farm of life and just a van away from being picked up ourselves.